[Justine] I want to ask about my ex-bf. Just around December last year, we were trying to be friends again, but I cut him off when I learned that he is dating someone new. And just around last month he emailed one of my close friends and was asking about me. I guess I’m just curious how his doing and his new relationship.
[Serenity Bly] Ok, Justine, in the past the Three of Wands (reversed) makes me feel like your relationship with your ex never really got a good start. Things always seemed to come up that would kill the mood and it never felt “right” to be with him.
[Justine] True.
[Serenity Bly] I get a very “young” feeling, from you both as people and from the manner in which you both approach your friendships/relationships. It’s as if you’re both quite new to this and don’t know how to act with each other. The Two of Pentacles in the present shows that he wants to work on that with you. There are no cups here so I don’t think he’s looking for a romantic relationship with you, he wants a friend.
[Justine] Ok.
[Serenity Bly] And he’s willing to work at being your friend. He’s ready to take a more mature stance and approach your friendship with a more adult eye. Know that even friendship is hard work because of your past together. The Two of Swords in the future indicts a very strong potential for conflict. Because he isn’t looking for a romantic relationship with you, chances are he IS still going to be dating others. And your personal feelings might be in conflict with that. If you’re attached to the outcome of this relationship and you WANT to be romantically involved with him you may have trouble seeing him with other women. Especially if you allow yourself to become his shoulder to cry on when things aren’t going well with him which is what I really feels this card is about.
[Justine] Does it say anything about him being happy with the relationship that he has now with this other person?
[Serenity Bly] It’s possible he’s looking for you now because things are rocky with his current relationship and he “needs” a friend who understands and will listen and take his side.
[Justine] I seem to be that friend that he turns to starting from his divorce and a break up
[Serenity Bly] There is no sense here of the future outcome of his current relationship. But I get a very strong impression that he takes advantage of you. That’s not healthy.
[Justine] Then we dated and didn’t work out but it’s weird how he keeps coming back when I keep cutting him off because I can’t be a friend anymore.
[Serenity Bly] “Port in a storm.” To me the message that comes with those words is a very real sense of how young and immature he is. When things aren’t working the way he wants he’ll pull into any port in the storm. You deserve better than that, Justine.
[Justine] Yes, thank you, that’s why I searched for answer in different way rather than letting him in so he can pour out his problems.
[Serenity Bly] As a friend, you can be a friend, be his shoulder to cry on, but if you want more than friendship with him his interest in other women will tear down your self esteem.
[MoonlitKim] If he only comes around when things aren’t working out, it will bring you down with him. That’s not a healthy relationship, even as friends.
[Justine] He always says he is looking for a lasting love and I always felt bad for him when things aren’t working out for him.
[Serenity Bly] From what I see in the cards, Justine, he IS looking for love, but not with you. And he’s too young for any of his relationships to be “lasting” at this point.
[Justine] Do you think the cards that you drew for me says if he will be pushing his way back in my life as a friend in need or let me be?
[Serenity Bly] HE will push for friendship. You have to decide if you want to be only a friend. You get to choose if his wants influence yours. You might find it better for you to turn down his friendship and give up the idea of being with him.
[Justine] Ok. The question just popped in my head while reading through. Thank you.
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